Deficate for cash?

Ok here we go again. I asked Dave if I give him $200 bucks a week, could I watch him shit once a day, all in the name of science.

Ok, after you stop laughing, here is his reply

"Hell no, I'll send you a video feed of me shitting for $100"

A video feed I said. "Come on, that's lame, the experiment consist of me sitting in the room and watching you, taking down notes that explain what your doing and what I am seeing." He once again gladly sent me to hell. His thought is that I am some freak, I told him "Dave it's all in the name of science, this is a way to help people get over stage fright, and to find out the differences between men and women in the toilet doing the same thing.

His reply was "James that sounds more like a scientific experiment on seeing how crazy "James" is and also its an invasion of privacy, fuck science." He continued, "You really are a sick fuck. You need help James. To watch someone shit. Why?

After I stopped laughing, I asked him,

"Dave you really wouldn't let me watch you shit for $200 a week? Seriously, no video, so there is not any danger of it appearing on "youtube" or anything like that, just me taking down some notes. Medical notes at that."

"James no is my answer"

At that moment, my roommate happened to walk in and ask, "What the fuck are you guys talking about in here?"

I explain to him what we were discussing, he starts to laugh, and as he is laughing I ask him the same question.

"Jay, would you let me watch you shit once a day for $200 a week?"

He replied nonchalantly,

"Sure why not? That's a sweet deal"

Now that is my boy.

Now comes all the questions, and comments from them.

1)How many shits do you get to watch? My reply was "just one shit a day for seven days, basically a week's work. Seven shits I would say."

2)Can I choose which one to allow you to watch? "Sure we would set it up in advance of course"

3)The morning shits are long, you had better pack a lunch for the morning ones, and mine are long. "Ok, lunch for a morning crap? You're in there that long?"

Therefore, I ask you now, my readers, would you let me watch you shit once a day for a whole week for 200 big ones? Once you stop laughing let me know what your answer is. Thanx
Till next time….

T-Mobile equals bad business.

T-Mobile is not Kool. Not Kool at all. I have been a loyal customer since 2001. I make every payment, some late, but I do not miss any. Now this month I paid them. I paid them on the eighth. Now I went over last month on my minutes so my bill was a bit outrageous. So I pay my monthly bill and say to myself, “Self, you’ll pay the whole thing off on either the next bill, or the week before its due. According to them, my bill is not due until June 6.

Well, lo and behold, they start texting, a week after I made my monthly payment, telling me that I need to pay immediately. So I thinking to myself, “Self, these guys are nuts”. I go to the website to check when my next payment is due, and bam there it is, June 6.

So I go and pay my “Con Ed” and my “Verizon” bill thinking that life will be good. I go on a few job interviews, put gas in my car, you know, do my thing. I stay on the grind, getting a new job is my main priority. So my mind had been preoccupied with tons of things running through it I sign in to my unemployment lat on Sunday, around 10ish.

I am thinking that my money will come in on time, because I signed in on Sunday and all will be well. But no! Not in “James” world. Things gotta go wrong.

My unemployment check is supposed to be in my account on Wednesday morning, but being that I signed in late it gets pushed back a day. No worries I say, I got some cash on me, everything is paid off and I should be good. I go to make a phone call and bam! There is this unfamiliar sound.

“Do dee Do, your call cannot be completed at this time because your service has been temporarily disconnected, and you will be transferred to our automated system to make a payment”

Huh? Is all I can say. They cut me! Those bastards cut my phone service. I check when my next payment was due and it reads once again, June 6. What the hell are these guys doing? I made a payment this month, I am not running anywhere, nor am I hiding. They cut me before my next payment was due. I tried calling them, but my phone wont make any outgoing calls. Even the 611 feature does not work. They really cut me. These bastards, that overcharges at every given chance, give me shitty reception, with shitty service, and I still pay, cut me. I am appalled.

Wait until I get them on the line. I will rip into them, and force them to severe my contract. This is not the way to treat your loyal customers. At least wait until I pay or don’t pay my upcoming bill.
Damn you T-Mobile!

Till next time.

Grilled Chicken Wrap.

“Wendy’s Grilled Chicken Wrap”

Today I will talk about this, now the reason I am even discussing it is that it let me down. Here I am at home watching TV on my couch, and every other commercial is a “Wendy’s” commercial, showing off their new “Chicken wraps”. Now I am hungry and it is looking good. Time goes by and my hunger subsides.

Bam! The damn commercial is back on.

“Ok, this wrap looks kinda big in that ladies hand. Hmmmmmmm, I think I am feeling hungry again.”

Well I sit there for a minute or two thinking it over. Should I go to “Wendy’s” is all that is running through my head. Nah, I don’t feel like wasting the money nor the gas, but damn, I am hungry and would you look at the TV, there is the answer, get a new “Grilled Chicken Wrap to go”.

There it is, my decision is made, that wrap looks like it’s a nice good size, I get me some fries, or nuggets with it and I’m good.

Off to “Wendy’s” I go.

I tell you, I get to the place and the “wraps” look good on the signs. I place my order, get my food and I run to my car. Man, I am hungry, cant wait to get home and chow down, I stick my hand in the bag to get me some fries and I pull out the wrap. Would you believe that this has to be one of the smallest “wraps” I have ever had. I nearly stopped in my tracks when I got a look at this. Oh man, I am fuming now, this commercial mislead me, big time. This lil ass snack is not going to do anything for me. Damn! I knew I should have checked the bag before I left.

Well to end this rant, or sort of rant, I will tell you all, do not! I repeat, Do not, get your self a “Wendy’s Grilled Chicken Wrap” if you are hungry. The “Wrap” is strictly a snack.