Hello all. Ok this one is for the gentlemen out there, for this example let’s pretend you have a fairly young attractive mom. You and your friends go out for a night on the town and end up in a strippers bar. You all pound drinks and decide to get a few lap dances. Your friend makes the arrangements and tells you all to go to the next room and wait for the girls.
Well as the ladies enter you realize that one of them is your mother.
Lets say youand your significant other had an early morning quickie, well on your way to work in the morning your on the bus and you hear people chattering behind you, you turn around only to have an elderly lady ask you this question,
Why me? Is what she thought. Damn shit is not funny, is what was running through her mind, I have seriously got the worst fucking luck. Damn!
Just the other day things were looking up for her; she had put her car on “Craigslist” for sale and was content with what was going on in her life. She came to me and told me bout her ad, and asked if I could help out,
“Sure” I told her, “Just let me look at the ad”.
I looked at the ad and noticed that it wasn’t posted in “New York”,
“Now that’s your problem right there, the ad is posted in “New Jersey” north jersey of all places, no one looks there, place your ad in “New York” and watch how you’ll get replies within the day”.
Well she went and placed the ad in “New York” like I told her, and would you know, within the hour she had a reply. She called me ecstatic saying the guy would be there in a little bit to checkout the car, I was happy for her also, no need for a lady with a one year old to have a second car just sitting there in her driveway,
“Make that money” is what I told her.
Lo and behold my phone rings by 6 o clock that day; it was her in a frantic tone.
“James, this guy was nuts” “Huh, please explain, and calm down, tell me what happened”
She takes a deep breath and proceeds to fill me in on what occurred.
“Well this guy came by, looked at the car and said that it looked great, then asked if it would be ok if he can start it up, sure I told him as I handed him the keys. He pulls out over 12 hundred bucks in cash and says if it starts up, he’ll take it”
“Ok, what happened then, it sounds like it went well” is what I said.
She began to cry and say “No it didn’t go ok, this sick fuck got in my car with his money laid it on the passenger seat and reached in his pocket for a small bottle, started up the car, looked my way, smiled and proceeded to open the bottle and pour its contents all over himself and the inside of the car. I yelled hey what are you doing? He just looked at me, smiled and lit a match and put himself and the inside of the car on fire. The car went up like a straw house, and the money he brought also burnt up with him. This is some crazy shit James, why me?”
“Damn hon", was all I could muster. Then I followed up with, “You mean to tell me, that this guy came over to buy your car, showed you money, told you he would take it, got in the car to start it, and then poured gasoline all over himself and lit himself on fire in your car?”
“Yes” is what she got out in between sobs.
I started to chuckle a bit at this story because this shit is crazy. What the fuck would posses a man to light himself on fire in a car he intended to buy, with the money at his side? That is the craziest shit I’ve heard in awhile. Damn some people got no consideration for others.
Well she got stuck with a burnt car, a burnt person in it, and 12 hundred dollars burnt up also. So she has no car or money now and got a traumatic experience on top of it. Some people just have really fucked up days, remember this story the next time you think your having a bad day.
Hope you enjoyed this fictitious tale, till next time….
One would think that a place called “The Raping Pit” would think that it’s a bad place? Am I wrong for assuming this? Can anyone out there tell me that a place called “The Raping Pit” would be a good place to go for a night?
Seriously, when you go down the basement and look under the staircase, all you see is a large hole, and in that hole is nothing but darkness, with a glimmer of an arm or teeth, sometimes even a buttock. But that’s all you see when you look down into “The Raping Pit”.
Now what makes me say this is one day this guy sot loud with me in my basement, so I punched him in the face, put my foot up his ass and threw him down the hole. Now s far as I can tell he never got out of there, don’t know why he never left but he chose to stay down there. Some people are a bit odd I tell ya.
Well for the next few months anybody that upset me and I wanted to get rid of, I would throw down the hole. Now I would hear some crazy shit down there, most of it I can’t repeat, but I sorta knew what was going on down there. That’s how I came up with the name.
But it seems to me that anyone I throw down there would just stay down there and join the growing crew. Pretty soon they were demanding people and food. One of them even had the balls to write me a note asking for cable. I told em to go fuck themselves and threw a midget down there.
So would you like to be thrown down into “The Raping Pit”!
Okie dokie, I know I have been gone for awhile, breaking a wrist can do that to ya, and on top of that I got hit with writers block big time. Well last night I came up with another “Scenario” to add to my collection of “Scenarios”.
I am still searching for a publisher for the book but until then I will keep testing em out on my “Blog” fans. Hope you all like this one, and give some feedback as to what you would do? I am still working on what to call this one, so any suggestions would be appreciated. Hope all is well
Till next time….
Scenario #59
“You’re on your way to meet your “Significant other” for an “After Work” drink.
Just as you get to the door of the bar you receive a text message on your phone.
It’s him/her letting you that they can’t meet you, that there stuck at work for the night.
As you read this you say to your self, “I’m here might as well get a drink”,
As you enter the bar you see him/her having drinks with another person.”
